Infants Lose Restroom Real Estate to PlayStation Consoles

CELINA, TN — Celina 52 Truck Stop has officially ripped out its bathroom baby changing stations to install PlayStation 5 consoles. Management struck a deal with GameStop to repurpose the fold-down plastic tables into gaming kiosks, citing plummeting birth rates and a total lack of revenue from infants. Patrons had long complained that changing diapers in a truck stop restroom was depressing, so ownership decided digital combat was a better use of the tiled wall space.

Not everyone is thrilled with the upgrades. 2nd shift Lead Cashier Colby Kappleman spent his morning violently evicting a loitering trucker from the station, eventually subduing the man in a chokehold next to a urinal. "I told corporate the PS5 is garbage because it won't play my old PS2 discs," Kappleman said. "The next guy who spills energy drink on the diaper groove is getting powerbombed."